Becoming Someone I can Trust..... Pt. 2

Building Trust and Being Real

Getting to know me, Getting to know me, Getting to know all about me....... We can't trust someone we don't know so this is the beginning of being able to act out of who we are. But some of us do know ourselves and have found those things that we would rather not expose to the sunlight of relationship or social situations. Congratulations, I would like you to meet your shame poisoned EGO. 

 Here is a definition for Ego that I like - the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity. When the ego is left unchecked like an aggressive dog it will run rampant, destroying everything authentic in it's path unless it is kept on the leash of Humility. Tempered by humility, ego then becomes a driving force, power under control that can allow us to respond intuitively and creatively in the moment.... more on that later.

 We plant the seed of humility in the same soil that we prune the over-sized ego. Now here are the most common pitfalls -

1. I don't have those issues that require this kind of work. I'm fine. I'm different
2. I have too many issues. I'm worse than you think and than I'm willing to show anyone. ("If they really knew me, they wouldn't accept me") I'm different

 Develop an awareness of the things you do well, and the ways you want to be/do better. This has to be a judgement free zone in order to really be able to see ourselves as we are, rather than the image we are trying to broadcast to others. "God hath given you one face, and you make yourselves another." - William Shakespeare. This has to be thorough and fearless inventory in order to shift our focus from:

1. Self deception to Self awareness
2. Knowing to learning
3. Defensiveness to Dialogue
4. Shame to Grace
5. Victim to Owner of our own lives, experiences, circumstances, feelings, results, relationships, behaviors and finally taking ownership of the most important 2 things we have our heart and our mind.

 So in order to do this we need to decide if it is worth it - 

1. Am I tired of faking it and putting on a show?
2. Can others see behind my mask?
3. Has the weight of the loneliness become too much?
4. What if I told you who I am? Would you reject me?
5. Do I long for real connection and am I willing to take the risk of being known over the certainty of a superficial and artificial experience?

So is it worth it? Are you worth it? Is real worth it?

Yes and you know it!